FUCK IT im gonna quit

1. Suddle calm 3D wave bathroom tiling so it goes up and down as you walk.
2. Hollow Stash spot drawer handles.
3. A grease company called Elbow Grease.

4. Translucent kitchen cupboards (translucent to the out side so it gets sun inside for growing)
5. upside down BED S with straps.

SNOWY DAY

1. Bike Slippers for when you're bikes all snowy and you bring it over to someone else's house.

2. Bike Me (bike delivery service )

3. Re useable condom .... (ewwww. )

4. Napkins that reveal messages when you use them.

5. Water filled Key Boards.

GOAST PATROL

1. Dual horn system, nice + more aggressive car horns for more polite honks.

2. Electric bikes with stereos, horns and head lights.

3. Candy coated mouth guards for hockey players.

4. Personal cavity detector.

5. Custom PEZ dispensers of your face.

I can see clearly now.... but the rain is not gone.

1. A computer key board that plays music like a piano, but instead of needing to learn music, just learn how to spell to the tune of your favorite songs! :)

2. Trampoline generator so your kids can give you back some energy.

4. Tye dye color shoes.

4. Hollow ropes to drink water from while climbing.

5. Porn screen printed on the inside of your shirt so you can look inside to get inspiration. (when needed)

Naughty boy!

1. Cheese flavored waffles. 

2. Donut mobiles for grown ups who like eating in bed. 

3. Love triangle. A shirt company logo with a triangle with 3 hearts. 

4. Lunch on the moon. A service that drives you to the moon for a fancy dinner. 

5. Naked party's where everyone is naked. 

The Gooses

1. Mini Christmas tree hats. 

2. Bowling pin shaped loafs of bread and balls of cheese. 

3. Digital playing cards (that change secretly for cheaters) 

4. Shirt, pants & hat with accurate measuring tape printed on it so you know how tall you are. 

5. Christmas tree ponds with floating platforms under to place presents on. 

Meet Joe Black 2 coming soon!

1. stop eagerly pleasing people just so they think well of you.      

 2. analyze your neurosis and start dealing with it. 

 3. stop being angry and acknowledge your pain instead of projecting it on others.  

4.  dont play dumb. 

 5.  stop lying to yourself, and others.

Nummies

1. Toaster/ computer for morning nummies.

2. Candy with real live dead bugs inside.

3. Gold babies, like gold fish but shaped like lil' babies.

4. A movie about me using real footage but with a fictitious plot.

5. Translucent bike frame that you can drop neon lights in so they light up for better seeing.

10/10 - Mission from above

1. A hat that looks like a head bandage.

2. Clothing with strings on arms and legs so you can be gods puppet.

3. Computer monitors that are translucent glass when off.

4. Free perfume dispensers @ bus stops.

5. A website that steals, categorizes and sells all of my ideas to people who need them. (and only value them when they cost money)

Don - Dat - Do - Op

1. Kim chiizits. (Kim chi flavored cheez-its) 

2. Drum Throne (instead of drum stool) 

3. Pills that taste like brownies when you burp after they are ingested. 

4. An academic test that you take while biking to make it harder to get a good score. (For all the people who already aced the ACT/ SAT. ) 

5. Decorate a Christmas tree in your front yard - put gifts under it for everyone who walks by.

Goat meet

1. Kim chi ice cream

2. Pickled ginger ice cream 

3. Bike ice cream delivery. 7pm- 1am

4. Helium filled apples. 

5. Goat meat birthday cake. 

Show was my first word

1. Laser pointer shoes.

2. Translucent shoes. 

3. Be taller or shorter extendable shoe soles. 

4. Weed stash spot shoes.

5. Air conditioned shoes.

Is this a joke?

1. Aerosol spray on shoes for barefoot shoes.

2. Tea wrappers that dissolve in hot water for quick tea time.

3. A piano with keys made from bones of your favorite pet.

4. A clothing company that designs clothes that purposefully look really really gross.

5. Surgical implanted LED lights in your finger tips.

ALL IS LOST*

1. Steal drum coffee mugs. Play with chop sticks when cup is upside down.

2. Christmas ornament graffiti around the city on trees.

3. A real wrestling match between the republican candidates and democratic candidates.

4. Porn magazine pop up books. 3D

5. Adhesive puzzle piece wall paper.

Dudddeeeee.

.....1. Animal races where little action figures ride different types nof animals in races. 

2. Cups that have neon lights in the bottom to illuminate the  liquid. 

3. Gay stuff. 

4. Noodle strainers that make fun noises when you pour water through. 

5. Earrings that are attached to your hat.

Dragon bath time

U1. Translucent page book. Dang this is hard to read ! 

2. Twirler giant jump rope. 

3. Back yard pool ponds that continually funnel downwards like a black hole. 

4. Mountain bike paths up and down the banks of the missippi. 

5. Dolls full of fake blood so they splatter when they get hurt. :( 

WASHING TV

1. Put a washing machine in place of the TV in your living room.

2.  Bagels designed to float in the water so you can eat them in the bath tub.

3. Build a building that is secretly a weapon in someone else's country.

4. Thought tea, drink someone else thoughts in liquid form.

5. Mood hats that change color with your mood.

I think about you nearly every morning if not the moment my eyes open, then shortly after.  if it hurts to hear, then it also hurts to say, but the truth is, never wrong.

You are my most important thought, my most important vine and I water you without conscious effort or knowing. I feel these words might encourage you to be drowned but that never was my intention. 

 It seems like all I can do to bring us closer is sleep because for that split second every morning I feel like you're still with me. 

Questions about Sake

Two friends were walking down a street in Downtown Minneapolis. The street on which they walked upon was called Nicolette.

At the intersection where That Crazy Guy stands on top of the buckets and yells the word of god at people they stopped to listen... only for a moment they thought.

As they stood, a large crowd started to gather.  It became harder and harder for them to move on their own accord. They were now stuck inside an amoeba! Slightly frighted their lil' hearts started to race and their minds began to quicken. They were now being pushed from side to side and back and forth and had no control over which way would go next.  It was as if they had no control, and all the while The Man speaking the word of god over them kept yelling 'DIE' 'DIE' DIE' DIE' !!!!

Slightly panicked and a now a bit sweaty it was time to make a move or forever be apart of This Mans impromptu church session on the street. Crouching down low, with their eyes level to he bottoms of peoples jackets they slowly made their way out of the crowd and across the street to the other side.

Now they could finally see the group that they had been a part of, continuing to sway in rhythm with the crazy mans screams they decided to turn away and continue down towards the river.

When we got to the there, the first friend handed an unopened bottle of Sake from where it had been waiting in his back pack.

Wrapping his hand around the cap his friend attempted to open it but to no avail, his body was still shaking as if he were cold.

'Whats wrong?'

'It's what that man was saying... he said we were gonna die....'

Taking the sake back out of his friends  hand and cracking the cap open he looked back at his friends eyes.

You gotta put all that shit down if you wanna open the bottle.... no one can open something when they are still holding something else.

Then they got drunk looking over the train tracks and the cool graffiti under on the metal party of the train bridge.

Questions about hair:

And now for some more questions! Please answer them below in the comments.
Are humans the only living thing with hair that continues to grow until it is long? Is there any other animal that has these same traits? Does any animal trim its hair out of necessity? What does it mean when someone is bald? Can one acquire special powers from their hair just as a lesson from the past?... and whats up with bald people with beards? 
Is our hair like the negative copy of our thoughts? Wasted brain cells imprinted physically on top of our head like the grooves of a record replicating the shape of sound waves of which it deliberates?
Does our hair represent how fast we are thinking? 
How fast we are dying?
How many chances do I have to grow hair to my toes? 
In my next life when I am a lil’ doggy will I have that opportunity?
Is magic real and does searching for it detract from life itself if it is not?
WHO IS EVEN LISTENING TO THIS RADIO SHOW?... And why am I still in the back of this long dark room all alone in the woods?
(sound effect)
Tune in next time on: Alone in the woods.
Thank you for listening.

Senicle Words

What a cruel Price you thought you had to pay.

This is hard. It's so hard. Hard as a rock... Rock that has a density to it. If you were to thwap your knuckles against it as hard as you could... They would break. 

BUY WHY? Did you want this for yourself? 

Why would you? Desire THIS. 

No replacement, just disrespect for my own disgusting lack of taste. 

And maybe just maybe we can get along l think maybe maybe baby I think oh i think '

1. Blow up bike seats. 

2. Horse shoes with number stamp on the hoof so you know what direction they walked in. 

3. Animal shaped bike seats. 

4. Drums on bike handle bar. 

5. Textured eye shadow. 

1. A website that shows how many military personnel died that day. 

2. A live poker game between two country leaders for entertainment. 

3. Edible cotton candy wigs

4. Bumper lane roads for drunk drivers.  

5. Translucent towel. . 

I WILL BE ON BREAK FROM POSTING IDEAS WHILE I AM IN THE MOUNTAINS SEARCHING FOR IDEAS.

-Aaron Colantti
Author of 5 i de a s a day

DUDE can u even keep up with this shit or what?

1. Ice pack boxer briefs 

2. Ice cereal - KEEP IN FREEZER

3. 1 time use ice hats sold at the Zoo

4. Save all your cut hair. Fill a comforter with it. Now you are truly self sustained.

5. CRY CRY CRY all night.

1. Post man shoes with springs inside soles. 

2. Pringles cans that screw together with other empty cans so you want to buy more to build things

3. Pull down reusable paper window shades. 

4. Water and fish filled window curtains.

5. Pringle can hats

1. Flame light car headlights.

2. Full 4 lane slip and slide 

3. Stop lights that use live trees instead of a pole to hold it up. 

4. Shoes that keep a soil sample in the toe. Just kick the ground to collect. 

5. Shoes that release thousands of tiny marbles to slip on. Make it hard for a person to keep following you.

1. Hollow carrots to use for straws.

2. Toaster in dashboard on cars for early mornin' commuters. 

3. Tattoos at change colors when you lie. 

4. When you need something to do: 

Cook a large assortment of mini food, put it on a plate and give the squirrels a picnic. Take pictures. 

5. French press that has a button to re heat the already pressed liquid inside.

The fly

1. Water filled car tires. I don't know why. 

2. Emergency drinking water filled phone. 

3. Textured tattoos. 

4. Rope tube... Climb up to the top ... Now your thirsty... Just suck the water up from the bottom where you started. 

5. Email me: aaroncolantti@gmail.com

1. Carhartt diapers designed for outdoor babies. 

2. Digital tick scanner to locate Ticks on body. 

3. Haunted camp ground. A haunted house that takes place around your tent.

4. A cabin with a glass roof. Under a clear stream. 

5. Big Magnets inside the water tunnel under bridges. Magnets pull metal waste from the stream. 

Guacamole flavor tooth paste

1. Guacamole flavor tooth paste.

2. Armpit pouches to put things that need to stay warm into. 

3. Liquid sandwich - food on the go. Turkey, roast beef or veggie! 

4. Bacon baked in to fresh bread. 

5. Mildew smell cologne.

NOISE twenty TWO

1. Road made of clear coated book covers. 

2. Raisin maker. A hat with grapes attached. 

3. Ocean ears. Head phones with shells instead of ear speakers. 

4. Pants with a mini air conditioner in the crotch to cool down both legs. 

5. Pom Pom nipple bra.

Fold This

1. Traffic jam ice cream truck and jam sandwich truck. 

2. Fold up car

3. Paint with taste... Just lick it! 

4. Giant fish tank at top of IDS tower with big sharks in it. 

5. Sticky car tires to collect road items.

EXTEND !

1. Extendable shoes... For a lengthy investment. 

2. Glass floor bus anti litter campaign. 

3. Cigarettes with a tear off butts to encourage the throwing of only tobacco on the ground. 

4. Extendable car. 

5. Translucent mail trucks.

Post man Jim

1. Hot tub hammock. 

2. Fungi spore enriched trail wood chips. 

3. Outdoor kitchen. 

4. Finger print switch stickers for criminals. 

5. Canopy tree house campground.

Whuuu?

1.  Extendable shoes... For a lengthy investment. 

2. Glass floor bus anti litter campaign. 

3. Cigarettes with a tear off butts to encourage the throwing of only tobacco on the ground. 

4. Extendable car. 

5. Translucent mail trucks.

1. Year Ago 2 day

Until further notice:

Until further notice: 

I will be taking a hiatus from posting ideas online. 

I will be back. 

This ones the best one

1. Just quit and stop doing everything.

2. Just quit and stop doing everything. 

3. 

4.

5.

O - T

1. Edible rock candy keys for 1 time use

2. Robotic rollers on desk that dump everything into the trash every night.

3. Trash pit in the middle of your living room.

4. Sucka - A movie about a lolly pop.

5. Roller blades with hollow stash-spot wheels

NOISE

1. Strawberry flavored Key chains

2. Oatmeal filled couch cushions

3. Rocket booster shoe roller blades.

4. Animal shoes. line of intricate animal shaped shoes. Many different animals.

5. Mushroom flavored cigarettes.

ahhhhh

1. Hockey sticks that have space in the shaft to hold extra hockey pucks.

2. Secret compartment computer mice to hide things inside.

3. Crushed beer can wall paper (just nail them to your wall and eventually it will be wall paper)

4. Hot water dispenser fingers - plastic surgery procedure

5. Hot coffee soup.

maybe maybe

1. Blood ink pens - refillable anywhere, just jab and wait for your blood to fill the pen.

2. Mini hats for your pens to wear.

3. Genetically engineered christmas trees that grow ornaments.

4. Give a wild animal $500 in an attachable vel-crow  pouch.

5. Wet pockets. Made with slimy fabric.

Rough DAIIE

1. #CabinPorn coffee table book

2. Stash spot hollow human bones to surgically replace real bones with. 

3. Rainbow ice cream slip and slide. 

4. Water slide public transportation instead of busses. 

5. Hot water dispensers at bus stops in winter time. 

Moss wall paper

1. Grass sidewalk 

2. Moss sidewalk 

3. Grass indoor carpet

4. Apple tree carpets

5. Moss wall paper 

Post Apocalypse - Ditto Bar - Random Titles?

1. Antler Handel bars

2. Antler Plow 

3.  Bone bike - bike from made out of bones.

4. Hollow water filled helmet. 

5. Watermelon air tank. 

Towel Cape

1. Hammock jacket. 

2. Shoes with inflatable rafts that come out of the souls. 

3. Camel back hats 

4. Beer cans with breathalyzer attached. 

5. Towel Cape 

What the fuck!

1. A contest where people look for a ringing cell phone somewhere in the city. 

2. Use a text conversation from the past 3 months to make a screen play with.

3. Velcro on the bottom of socks and inside of shoes for traction. 

4. Shoes thst excrete lube on bottom when needed to do cool slides while you are walking. 

5. Coffee tables with a hole in the middle to place a potted plant inside. 

... And here's a picture about religion: 

Pictures! You love pictures!

1. Street lockers - @ bus stations. (for terrorists and drug dealers to use ;)

2. Maple Eggies (below)

3. Use a canoe as a snow sled.

4. Car brand that has a printer/copy machine in trunk. (like a 5 disk cd changer)

5. Panic protection. A app that automatically assigns an '!' on txt messages when your heart is beating fast.

1. Scrambled eggs

2. Diced onions

3. Tomato

4. Kale

5. Tahini sauce

Dinner @ my parents

Photo & ideas from Quintassi Coincidence

1. Bike tires with treads designed to make sound

2. Body coolers (like hand warmers but opposite) for hot days (like Ice but cooler(more stylish))

3. Bandanna that slowly releases cold water

4. Bike seat vibrators

5. Pedal foot massage

My broken thing is broken... Damnit.

1. Pillow phones - for talking on the phone when your in bed. 

2. Car honks that can direct the sound to the specific idiot you are trying to communicate to. 

3. Cars that have only a certain amount of honks allotted before the honker gives out and stops working. Use them sparingly... They are not unlimited! 

4. Lazy rivers instead of streets. 

5. Ping pong ball with different tones (specific musics notes) when they hit. Musical balls! 

Roman Candle

1. Pizza French toast. (Soak day old pizza in eggs then cook)

2. Rubber car interior, leather car tires. 

3. Gravel car roof. 

4. A company that makes bike tires out of recycled car tires. 

5. Glass steering wheel. 

Love Life

1. Hot air balloon house. 

2. Tattoos that can be turned on or off. 

3. A device that can determine what kind of animal poop you are looking at. 

4. A House made to be able to conjoin rooms when needed. (Like an extendable table) 

5. Colorful rice marketed to children.

Fuck Life

1. Bike handle grips/ bike light combo. 

2. Clear bike frame with lights inside. 

3. Bike peddle/ bike light combo. 

4. Fill a water bottle with paint, turn it upside down , open the top. Bike around creating a trail of paint so your friends can follow your path. 

5.  Flying bike. Linus Kangas

5B. Get a free surly back bike rack if you get 1-3rd place @ sol 31 -  June 21st.

Getting better

1. Roll up cell phones. 

2. Tree house camp sites connected by zip line. 

3. Bug playgrounds - play grounds with nets over them - containing many different bugs that don't bite for kids to play with. 

4. Bandaids for trees for when they have been wounded. 

5. News papers that automatically post articles with most likes from online. No censorship only likes determine what will be printed and distributed. 

She spat

She spat. 

Crunching her lips together and puckering, she waited for the tingle of saliva to excrete from the innards of her tung.  

She spat ferociously trying to expel the taste from her now soap infested talking hole. 

She could communicate without words too.

If she needed it. 

Shaking her head back and forth vigorously motor boating the air she sprayed a fine mist from her lips. Catching the sun for a brief moment a beautiful rainbow showed the entire spectrum of colors. 

Back to the dishes. 

Zeal!!!!!

1. Flyers paper that heats up when handed out. 

2. Coffee mugs with a mini coffee fountain in the middle. 

3. A program that randomly puts in 2 weeks notice via email to your boss with out you knowing when. 

4. Underwater computers for scuba divers. 

5. Mist makers that spray you in the face when you get too close to my fence.

Throat Note

1. A cable channel that is solely a live feed of what a wild animal is currently seeing and doing.

2. Job swap - a day when most everything is fucked up, most everywhere.

3. A game where you can add or subtract elements such as people, weather or social situations. Set the situations and see how evolution progresses.

4. Bike pulled traveling insect zoo.

5. Surgically implanted happiness dashboard - knows you're high and low dopamine levels.

Dick man

1. A pill that can be broken up in 24 parts. Each portion makes you sleep for 1 hour.

2. A scanner that can scan your current thought.

3. A website for complainers.

4. A special College for people who want to smoke cigs in class.

5. Instant Tye dye mix powder.

1. Party noise makers for your nose.

2. Streets made from materials that make music when you drive on them. Street name: Beat Street

3. Dragon zoo!!!!

4. Butt kazoo.

5. Package delivery. By dog.

FULL MOON STORIES EVERY FULL MOON ON FIVEIDEASADAY.COM

Part One

Jessicas Phone

She awoke to the sound of her phone binging off another text message. Rolling over and plopping her hand down perfectly on top the black rectangle without pre gaze, she lifted the phone high above her head looking up towards the ceiling to scan the screen and simultaneously elongate the space between her shoulder blades and stretch her back back to earth.


‘Poetic’

She said in response to the piddle drunkenly sent into space and back only to be so…

‘cliche’.

Throwing off the covers and rolling out of bed, Jessica threw her phone with back spin across the soft surface of the bed with a force she had not intended. Toppeling in cartwheels across the puffy white quilt over and down to the cement floor.

She stood thinking that her phone had survived much worse this before... but maybe this was worthy of a momentary panic.

‘Eeiihhh!!’

She screeched like her aunt. She hated when she did that.

Diving with arms out-stretched across the bed and shuffling on her chest to peer over the side of her eloquent 600 dollar Ikea frame and mattress to the floor below, only to find what she had been dreading.

Shambles.

Her phone was in shambles. No more text messages back and forth to space, no more quickies in the bathroom with Ricky Martin, no more nothin because...

Jessica’s phone was broken.

Part Two
Jessica's Phone

"It's fine." she thought ,"I need a break any way"


She sat up and rolled over, letting her feet dangle at the edge of her bed. Leaning forward, her body lurched and she groaned, slowly half sliding and half hopping to her feet.

Her ankles cracked and her knees responded as she stood up and stretched her arms up over her head. Making a cat like sound and emitting a small yawn she twisted her torso back and forth.

Rubbing her eyes she walked alongside her bed, turned at the corner of the frame and headed to the bathroom.

She walked into the small, cold bathroom and shivered as her toes and feet flattened themselves against the tile. Positioning herself in front of the sink, she switched on the light (a pull string next to the mirrored medicine cabinet).

Giving herself a few seconds to let her eyes adjust to the light, she looked up into the mirror...

Part Three
Jessica's phone

'Oh my fuuuccckkkiiinng god.'


Her face. It was hideous.

Looking in to the mirror as if it were a goats vagina she screeched yet again.

‘Eeiihhh!!’

Today was totally messed up. Turning on the shower while tending to her mangled face the mirror began to steam and the face looking back at her started to fade. Wiping the white from the glass she stared back at her self momentarily as the smokey water covered her back up like a shaken etchasketch.

Taking a deep breath then pushing the air out of her lungs while constricting her mouth she made a noise that can not be depicted in letters.

'Noise that can't be depicted with letters'

Pulling her pajamas down her legs on to the cold tile she pulled off her t-shirt placed it on the floor, then pushed both items neatly with her feet to the far side of the bathroom near the door.

Parting the shower curtain and entering the steamy pod she disappeared into the fog like a magician commanding a puff of smoke.

'Uggggggggg'

Today was gonna suck.

Part Four
Jessica's Phone

As she stepped into the pod and closed the curtain she let the steam roll over her body and pull it downward. The feeling of gravity was a welcome one--for what started out as a strange and stressful morning. First her phone, then finding a melty-goat face staring back at her in the morning was not what she had expected...though, she mused--if her phone hadn't been trashed she would have posted a Selfie on Facebook.


Katrina had something like this happen once...what did she do? She woke up--and there was a wiry, harry catface staring back at her--or wait? Was that Hermione in the girls bathroom in Harry Potter and the...whatever.
I'll deal with it" she thought flatly.

Jessica reached for the bar of soap on the left side of the pod when she heard a distinct "splat!" on the wet floor. She looked down and there was a oozy fleshy piece of goat's cheek, slowly flowing into the drain. "Ooohh yeah..." she remembered,"that's how it works". She looked up into the shower, closed her eyes and pressed her face into the hot water. "splat! splat! plop! plop! plop!" and pieces of flesh slowly began dripping from her face and landing in uneven pieces and piles on the pod floor...

Part Five
Jessica's Phone

Having successfully avoided any more references to reproductive structures, the ploppings and splattings gurgled down the pod's drain. Jessica gave her face one final rinse & exited the steamy womb. "Whoops!" she whooped & giggled to herself, "I'll bet it's the moon."


The big fluffy towel dried her & came away unsullied. One glance in the quickly cleared mirror confirmed her hopes & the fact that she had her own face back. She padded back to her bedroom & opened her laptop with which she proceeded to update her status to "-feeling HUMAN AGAIN," & just for the hell of it added ‪#‎agoatnomore‬.

In the refrigerator there was only feta, & two eggs.

Part Six
Jessica's Phone

Later that day at lunch.


A friend cracked a joke at her for eating raw eggs and feta crumbles.

'The hits just kept on comin'.
She said under her breath.

Her friend made a mean face at her, then walked away.

frown emoticon

A guy sneered at her for taking too long at the copy machine.

frown emoticon

And then...

The worst thing in the world that could possibly happen happened...

Part Seven - Alternate Ending 1
Jessica's Phone

'Beeeeeeeeeepppppp'


This was the sound of the old PA system booting up.

'Crackle crackle'

Stopping mid step on her way to the computer lab to upload another stress selfie, Jessica looked up at the little white box on the wall and it began to speak.

'...... Ahhh... Ex... Excuse me.... Hello... Is this thing working.....'

This was just great. She only had another 10 minutes of lunch to get to the computer lab, find a computer, open photobooth, take 33 pictures of her self, then upload one or six of them in quick secession to her wall.

This could be important. She stood motionless.

'Today, there has been an act of terrorism that has effected the entire world....'

They rarely turned this thing on.... And they said 'terrorism'. She looked around the room.

'It has resulted in the death of hundreds of thousands virtual lives.'

Padding her right, left, back left and back right pockets quickly looking for her phone she was re-reminded of her phones misfortune earlier that day.

'Facebook has crashed. Forever'

Now this was just about too much. Jessica had had quite a day... And now THIS!

This was her life that this little white box was talking about!

' This was Jessica's perfect little virtual life! '

She clasped her hands over her mouth. Had she just referred to her self in the 3rd person out loud?

Did Jessica just shriek loudly like a crazy person!? Looking around the room, the people were no longer staring at the little white box...

They were ALL staring at HER.

'Stop looking at me!!!!'

Jessica yelled, pivoting 180 degrees and bolting for the door she ran through grey carpeted halls, down the stairs, through the lobby doors, in to the lobby, through the exterior doors, then out side across the side walk and in the street.

Falling to her knees, and stretching her hands to the sky Jessica shrieked at the top of her lungs.

'AhHhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!'

'AhHhhhhhhhhhhhhhHhhhhhh!!!!!!!!'

'Deep Inhaling sounds'

'Ahhhhhhhhh'

Jessica put her face to the ground.

She could see all the little tiny black rocks that made up the road.

She could see the minute details of the cracking yellow lines.

She could feel the warm asphalt and the gritty texture.

Jessica could feel.

'Beeeeeeeeeeepppp...thud.'

-
The end

FULL MOON STORIES EVERY FULL MOON ON FIVEIDEASADAY.COM

1. Cookie tacos - Killian Korhonen

2. Stickers at whole foods that say 'certified organic organ donor'

3. Fill a plastic glove up with milk... Little hole in the fingers. Milk it baby.

4. Trampoline floor basketball tournament.

5. Cell phones that tells u how fast your car is driving. For when you aren't the one using it.

1. Car tires that screech when you are speeding.

2. Translucent windmills.

3. Clothing that expands like a sponge animal for camping.

4. Shoes that give you a foot massage when you sit down.

5. Hair dye pills hat change your hair color.

ekiN

1. Working Piano keys for car bumpers. 

2. Big Scissors for cutting whole burgers (with bun) in half. 

3. Miniature tap for beer cans. 

4. Led screen beer coozy. 

5. An app that determines the pace you are walking at and plays music to that beat. 

Real clock?

1. Animal head sprayers for hoses.

2. Mini piano belt buckle with working keys. 

3. Mobile laundry matt with eco friendly soaps. 

4. Pizza tacos

5. Music for deaf people that is only super loud bass. 

This is for the one who stand up and lives. 

Because without you we have nothing. 

We hold our shortest desire but you have a longer want. 

Every single being is tactfully observing their surroundings. 

You are the one who inspires the next generation lusting for life, looking for air. 

It is your willingness to feel that inspires desire in us all. 

Party time

1. Punching bags that punch back.

2. Shoes that generate energy from springs inside.

3. Bark changers that change the bark sound of a dog to a different animal of your choice.

4. Google glasses for cats for virtual mouse catching - watch out for the walls!!

5. Health cigarettes that reverse the damage from real cigarettes.

Dog that talks a lot

1. Green peppers with tomatoes on the inside

2. Challenge sidewalks

3. Love bombs filled with hormones.

4. Pickup truck with bed in the front.

5. Edible pizza boxes.

Part One 

Jessicas Phone

She awoke to the sound of her phone binging off another text message. Rolling over and plopping her hand down perfectly on top the black rectangle without pre gaze, she lifted the phone high above her head looking up towards the ceiling to scan the screen and simultaneously elongate the space between her shoulder blades and stretch her back back to earth.   

‘Poetic’ 

She said in response to the piddle drunkenly sent into space and back only to be so…

‘cliche’. 

Throwing off the covers and rolling out of bed, Jessica threw her phone with back spin across the soft surface of the bed with a force she had not intended. Toppeling in cartwheels across the puffy white quilt over and down to the cement floor.

She stood thinking that her phone had survived much worse this before... but maybe this was worthy of a momentary panic. 

‘Eeiihhh!!’ 

She screeched like her aunt. She hated when she did that.

Diving with arms out-stretched across the bed and shuffling on her chest to peer over the side of her eloquent 600 dollar Ikea frame and mattress to the floor below, only to find what she had been dreading.

Shambles.

Her phone was in shambles. No more text messages back and forth to space, no more quickies in the bathroom with Ricky Martin, no more nothin because...

Jessica’s phone was broken.

Justshootme

1. Stress pins to poke your self with when ur feeling nervous.

2. Writing utensils that attach to your finger tips permanently.

3. Dizzy bear - a game where you spin a bear around and see if it can walk straight.

4. Panic room closet - filled with cozy nice things for when you are freaking out. 

5. Action figures that attach to the top of car roofs with magnets. 

Oh shit... This oceans deep as fuck.

1. A city made for rabbits - a reality tv show

2. Government regulated personal Dollar printers. 

3. Take your journal - change the names and places - write a fantasy novel

4. Bar codes on all the things you own so you can scan them in to your computer to get inventory of how much you are worth (but really that's not how much ur worth... You know that... Right? )

5. Tune in every Full Moon for Full Moon stories by Captain Moon on 5ideasaday.com 

Cone up.

1. Title for a book - Clouds on Fire

2. Shock collar for children called: Inside Voices

3. Liquor shots inside the plastic balls in candy machine at bars.

4. Lockers around the city with cliff bars for people to eat - sponsored by cliff bar.

5. Cone up.

Naught Naughtier

1. Pills to make your spit glow in the dark.

2. Glow in the dark skin marker sex toys.

3. Penis hat marker. Place on head of penis to use penis a drawing utensil. 

4. A high powered light to put in your butt or vagina so your hole stomach glows. 

5. Whistles designed for vagina blowing. 

RANCID

1. Future Detector - App

2. Coffee Mugs with smoking pipe built in.

3. Firmness detector so you will know if you are about to sit on something too hard.

4. Guesser - An App that just assumes what it thinks you might want... then buys it with your money online.

5. Cardboard boxes that can be blown up instead of built with tape and folds.

LITWIN

Matt Litwins Ideas 

1. Does drinking a slushy upside upsidedown give you brain freeze faster?

2. Take iascwa and sit on a carpet watching aladin, and see if it floats.

3. collect cans cut holes in top put knot string in them and grab ends and you have stilts, now go play soccer.

4. Go watch a crime movie, animal kingdom is decent one.

5. Take a small onion dice, put in bowl with cold water and ice cube, mix around drain. Take 2 tomatoes, dice, put in bowl with onion, chop cilantro, maybe mix a bit, add salt, if you want, and some lime juice.. You got some pico de gallo, grab chips a taco and meat with a margarita you got a meal. Boom, enjoy the day

https://www.facebook.com/limpiodesigns?pnref=story

TIE DIE

1. Milk cartons that turn a different color the older that your milk is getting.


2. Plates that congratulate you when you put more fruits and vegetables on them.


3. A kaleidoscope that reflects what is actually happening in your mind instead of beads and stuff (this one could get weird lol)


4. A type of lotion that when ever you shake someones hands it leaves a invisible glow in the dark paint that you can only see with special glasses.


5. Heated Head phones for Minnesotans.


With a little help from Libby F

DRY DOG

1. An umbrella that straps onto your dogs stomach and keep it from getting rained on.


2. Shampoo that makes your head feel warm, when you can't afford hot water.


3. A Pot for cooking Spaghetti that sings Italian love songs to you as it heats up.


4. Pillow case inserts that record audio while you sleep--to figure out if you snore or talk... and what you say.


5. Roller skates that pump out jams the faster you blade.


Libby F

PLASTIC WHALE KILLER

1. A butter knife that holds the butter & warms it to be spread

2. A suit that changes patterns with your mood

3. Underground forest

4. Hologram hair instead of styling


5. "Mood ring" style underwear




Aria Aria Aria

ACROSS THE OCEAN

1. A wireless leash

2. warning system for endangered animals so they can avoid hunters

3. smartphones for pets

4. Grass with greater nutrients that uses less water so cows etc. animals don't need to eat as much. Good for third world countries.

5. A chip what makes animals able to talk to humans.

Tuomas Jurvelin

Rope Queen

1. Abolish all debts. Jubilee!!!

2. Make all weapons fire backwards.

3. Musical chairs (that play music when you sit down)

4. Houses with pits through the center down in to the basement with a fireman pole down.

5. Go Pro belt buckle.

with a little help from Rusty Korhonen

SQUID SHEEP

1. Breed sheep that can live under water.

2. Plastic surgery air tank and breathing tube installed INSIDE your body. Go under water without all the bulky extrusions.

3. A app that can accurately estimate when you will need to pee next.

4. A phone that is shaped like 3 balls glued together.

5. A phone that is a touch screen on back front and sides. ALL TOUCH

Got Milk?

1. Indoor fireworks.

2. Back seat bunk beds in Subarus

3. Castle turrets on top of your car.

4. Etch a sketch exterior for cars.

5. Milk fountains @ malls. Got Milk?

GRIP DAT

1. Glow in the dark dog leashes.

2. Musical instruments designed for dogs and other animals to play.

3. A shirt company that has one shirt of every animal that exists. the brand is called ANIMALS

4. Plastic surgery for pets.

5. Sandpaper grip pencils.

Bank Talk

1. Fish tank bumpers for cars.

2. Candy Apples (mini candy shaped like apples)

3. A website that finds all the info about you that is stored by the other websites you use.

4. NightyNight.com a website with bedtime stories.

5. Basil Ice Cream

www.midwestlove.org

Campground

1. Tinder for real estate - swipe right if u like

2. Fish food that is florescent and make the fish glow from inside.

3. One legged pants (pant)

4. Little soccer goal nets across all street drains.

5. Motor sounds from speaker attached to ur bicycle.

City Surfing

1. Warped Onion fish wings

2. Janisper Bush fairy dust

3. Candy pigeon elderberry

4. Manager Feet (with corridor snatch)

5. Carpet Cleaner Magic Onion breath

Rope in the pant leg

1. Toe mittens.

2. A skin piercing that connects all your fingers.

3. Jelly bean earrings. 

4. Free hot tea dispensers at all police stations 

5. Baseball hats with tv screens on the front. 

Comin out on pop

1. Jewelry for cars to wear. 

2. Plastic surgery to make all of your toes look like toy cars. 

3. A surgeon who performs on you while you are being driven a cross the country- mobile surgeon 

4. A canvas that is many canvas pieced together in a way that can be disconnected when painting is finished.  

5. Fish shaped backpack. 

www.midwestlove.org

1. Plant growing races.

2. Apples with cream cheese inside. 

3. City kiddy pool day, where the whole city is a giant pool party.

4. Parking garages underneath streets as to not take up space.

5. A shop that gives animals piercings. 

Resident of the month

1. Resident of the month - like employee of he month for city residents.

2.  Car pool lanes on all in-city highways for the resident of the month.

3. A pack of fake Velcro cockroaches to attach to your dog for Halloween. For sale a Halloween super stores. 

4. Contests performed by doctors at festivals to see who in attendance is the most healthy person across the board. 

5. The suit makes it possible for ur whole body to be hung on a hook. A great place to sleep! 

Beer bomber

1. Night vision goggle golf.

2. Packaging made of edible dried pasta, with rice cracker foam protection. No More Waste! 

3. Car interiors that fold completely flat into double beds

4. Goggles that you can't see through but guide you around things at night with inferred. 

5. Styrofoam 1 time use car bumpers. 

Dope Candy

1. Gloves that vibrate when you get a txt message.

2. A food shelf free donated food chain restaurant.

3. Drugs that make you sober when you are drunk or high - called Double Negative

4. MutantPlastics A company that makes and instals plastic surgery 3rd arms for humans.

5. Plug in mugs that keep your drink warm. (does this already exist?)

DO NOT DELETE

1. Liquid filled rings for emergency hydration.

2. camelbak water bag shirts. - Fill up your clothing with water (you might look a little fat until you drink it all)

3. A shipping company  (Fedex) that leases, maintains and recycles all shipping materials.

4. Credit cards made of wax.

5. Glass or translucent plastic Ant Farm Bike Frame (with live Ants inside).

Tomorrow isn't the problem...

1. Clogs made out of ice.

2. Danger signs in front of McDonalds and other fast food places.

3. Floor security cameras. 'For a whole new way of looking at things' 

4.  Fill someone's pillow case with all your dirty socks.

5. An App that shows how many hours you worked @ ur job  and how much your pay check will be - in real time - (amount shown in top right corner by your battery fullness indicator)

I've got no breaking news for you .

1. Clothing line that promises to sell the exact same style clothes for 85 years without visible change or modification to sizing.

2. Blow up bike frames.

3. Fire pits in waiting rooms. 

4. Furniture apolstered in cardboard. 

5. Sandpaper shoe soles 

Rope ice

1. A famous Artist that travels the world hiding art in hard to find places.

2. Fountains with water that goes up hill. 

3. Tinder for people with STD's called 'Fuck it' 

4. Floating aquariums 

5. Bill board fountains with water pouring over ad but ad is still visible. 

No body's putty

1. Water filled muffins.

2. Refrigerated cerial with milk inside. 

3. Municipal duty like jury duty for city jobs. 

4. Vibrating bycicle seats for woman.

5. Semi truck aquariums that drive around city. 

Warm liquid

1. Shoes that vibrate right of left to give directions.

2. Yarn fences

3. A website that tracks all police and what they are doing. 

4. Heated wrist watches 

5 chocolate coated cups that melt when warm liquid is added. 

Light show

1. Non the weed like decaf coffee

2. Toilet seats with water and fish inside. 

3. Toilets that weigh your poop. 

4. Coats with backpack built in to back.

5. Bluetooth speakers that also make a light show to music. 

Ur party

1. A drug that makes you think you are one if your friends instead of yourself

2. Self cleaning clothes 

3. A service that puts you to sleep and ships you to your destination. 

4. R u my mommy? 

A service that wakes you up for school. 

5. A collective of really cool girls that will come to ur party. 

Alligator

1. Alagator shaped pickles.

2. Cover your phone in electrical tape instead of buying waterproof case

3. Robots that walk around eating garbage. 

4. Quilts filled with grinder up sterilized trash instead of feathers. 

5. Use band aids on eyes to block light when sleeping

New products

1. Clothing made out of solar panels.

2. Hair stencils to cut in shapes to hair.  (For dogs too) 

3. Phones that have little printers inside them. 

4. Genetically engeneered vines with really sharp thorns to be used like barbed wire. 

5. A t shirt line of old children's tv shows. 

Love triangle

1. Trees bread to have red leaves shaped like hearts.

2. City commissioned musical instruments attached to street lights for people to play.

3. Fruit trees for public consumption on street. 

4. Glow in the dark cigarette papers for rolling tobacco in the dark. 

5. Hat with fold down eye cover flaps. 

Kate the great

1. Cup holders on sides of shoes.

2. Waterproof bike sterio system

3. Hat with inflatable pillow in back. 

4. Hat with fold down eye flaps. 

5. Coats that can be filled with grass and sand for more thickness and warmth. 

Dope sauce

1. Heated underwear

2. Shoes with warmers on the bottom to melt ice.

3. Toilet seats with weights on back so it stays verticle when not in use (and the pee drips off) 

4. Ant farm see through sidewalks 

5. Flirt detector app. Find out if they are flirting with you. 

Reality tv show

1. Reality TV show about a trash can and all that happens around it.

2. An app that automatically checks in with your parents and tells them you are doing something wholesome. 

3. Sculptures made with yarn and hairspray. 

4. An app that takes your temperature. 

5. Government issued FB pages for newborns.

The plague

1. Dye the city water red for Aprils fools day.

2. Give our free pancakes on May Day.

3. Colorful toilet paper.

4. Sky scrapers made completely of glass including the floors and structure. 

5. A group of groupies called 'the band aids' 

lake of thunder

We waited to find what we knew would not come

Though it past faster than before the war was not done

Still waiting for more, the sleep did not take

He took a deep breath from the bottom of a lake. 

Ocean sadness

1. Snickers with twice inside.

2. Bikes with tent rolled up inside top tube. Bike can be used as poles.

3. Long games to play at airports like Settlers of Catan.

4. Trip planners that don't tell you your destination. They do the packing for you.

5. Boats that glow in the dark so they don't need lights.

7

1. Notebooks with holes in the paper like windows on random pages. 

2. Orange juice filled fish tanks.

3. A toy that omits a wave that let's you draw inside clouds like an etchasketch 

4. Marbles thst contain the ash of dead loved ones inside. 

5 Drone drop days - when drones drop presents for people all over the world so they all lighten up about the whole drone thing. 

6.

1. A grocery store that also offers the use of a nice kitchen, dishes and tables.

2. Free bike lights @ DMV.

3. White board car paint. Attach dry erase markers all over for people to draw with. 

4. White board bike paint.

5. Weed smuggled in professionally packaged tea bags and boxes.

5

1. A pill to make your swear taste and smell like chocolate.

2. A pill for make your poop smell profusely like roses. 

3. A porn site called: mypenisisathermomiter.com

4. Repaint the yellow lines on the highway blue just to fuck with you. 

5. Introduce a new species to your town over ten years. Keep buying more (of that animal) every pay check and releasing them to the streets. 

4

1. Solar panel hats.

2. Fitness center that powers lights with workout machines.

3. Candy flavored nail polish.

4. Juice milk

5. A law that illegalizes the use of plastic bags at stores. 

3

1. Line a dark path in the woods with Christmas lights.

2. Ghost stories about toasts coming out of dirty diapers to scare children in to alerting the parent when they poopy. 

3. Fear based quit smoking plan. 

4. Little plastic windows in the front of milk cartons to see the contents. 

5. Lighter doozie that has pockets. 

2

1. Floating Movie theater. 

2. Underwear with pockets.

3. Under water vending machines.

4. Shark tanks that float in public pools.

5. Coffee mugs that have a light in the bottom that shines up. 

1

1. Airport safe bike bags that turn in to bike racks for bike touring. 

2. Shoes that look like turtles 

3. Food balls of all the different food groups crammed in to a ball. 

4. Hats made out of marshmallow. 

5. First aid kit that can be placed inside your bike seat post. 

My friends they understand me but my life makes no sense. I wish I had volumes to explain where I went. 

I've found flowers are words so now I grow books, as pretty as angels with dark eyes like hooks.

I spend all my time building cities in my mind and open my eyes I find I'm still blind. 

In darkness I wait until I am dead, just to be reborn and re read what I said.